Sorry, 2013

   

I have a heart.

I have a brain even if I don't always use it.

What I should ask for is courage.

   

Hashtag Great Pussies Think Alike.

   

I amaze myself.

      

      

I constantly think that I should know better but

 at the end of the day,

 I guess I actually don't.

Or I know but absolutely do not care.

I constantly wonder what shrimp think about.

         

Night Moves.

                      

           

The answer is yes.

    

         

Blackout Princess

     

      

Funny how that was the beginning of the end.

My only regret: 

I cannot remember 

the hows, whys, and why nots.

  

This hole is deep.

I know the only way out is up

but what happens when I come out the other side?

I wish there was a video of this nut-shot.

  

       

Fire Ants

       

                                                                                 

Just having one of those days

when you realize that you're not going to pay your rent on time 

and you know that you're not going to find a great, new apartment

and any dude you're attracted to is attracted to your friends and not you

and you are worthless and fat and dumb.

   

Pretty stupid problems.

Stupid but bothersome.

I want to growl like a bear.

     

Depressed.

                                                                 

                                                               

You've yet to have your finest hour.

               

Friends & Family > Everything Else

Gooby pls

I'm looking at your facebook and I'm like,

"WOAH."

You have made it your daily mission

to become a famous actor.

I wonder what would happen if I did that for one year...

The only problem is,

that sounds like the worst year of my life.

Private Idaho

Hate blogs.

Love pictures of cats.

Second Grade

Acts like a princess,

Eats like a frog.

If she ever finds her prince,

He will sleep like a log.

Poop is my favorite palindrome.

Ah, whatever, who gives a fuck!

What is a brain?

I used to be like, "Holy shit, I'm so fucking awesome."

Okay, I never really did it like that, it was more like, "I think I'm pretty okay, bitches."

But now I'm like, "Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh."

Now I'm like, "I'm too scared to talk on the phone, I have anxiety problems, I'm too pussy shit to do anything because then I might fail and look stupid."

And everyone else is like, "Check me out, my dick is huge. Excuse me, I meant to say 'dicks.' My dicks are huge. I have multiple dicks, did I mention that already?"

And I'm like, sitting here waiting for someone to hand me something or to pat me on the back and say, "Good job, Tara, you've been waiting so patiently, here is a prize and a blow job and all of your hopes and dreams in a basket."

And I'm like, jealous, or whatever, of what everyone else is doing, the smallest little things, but I could be doing those things too, but I don't because I am mentally retarded and really dumb and probably lazy but mostly just scared.

And then I sit at my computer and think about how it's not fair but it is. It is fair.

This is not about fame, or money, or any of those weird things that we all like

(and pretend not to like.)

This is not about...anything.

This is about my life and doing whatever I want with it as long as it's something other than longing for your dicks or waiting for the man with the basket.

Barbecue ribs.

Does your news feed feed you?

Help me, mother.

I am an outstandingly awful grownup.

(Does anyone ever teach you how to do it right?)

Baby steps.

Good theatre should

make you laugh,

blow your mind,

and cover you in blood.

Your seat in the audience should never be safe.

"Well, I want to die."

Dig that hole, mother fucker!

Truck, truck, truck.

LET'S CARVE PUMPKINS.

Do a barrel roll.

I'm going to stay awake

forever until I die and then

I'm going to sleep forever.

Depressed. Hungry. Thirsty.

I wish it was like trying to put toothpaste back into the tube because I could do that.

Chatty.

If I could open my skull and see my brain,

I would scoop out the stupid part

and flush it down the drain.

If I could open your skull and see your brain,

I would pick around all the smart

until I found the little part

that remembered me.

And I would hide it.

Probably at the top of a tree.

(Because you don't climb trees anymore.

And you will never climb trees again.)

And I would get on a boat

and I would sail far away

and I would spend the rest of my life

thinking about how smart and sad I am.